As someone whose husband’s job has us relocating ever so often, I have a lot of tips on how to do it well and thrive in your new community! We have lived in Carnation Wa, Keyport, Wa, Kennewick, Wa, Richland, Wa, and Hillsboro, Or. We are a homeschooling family, so that makes it possible for us to up and leave anytime Nate has a new project. Here are my tips for how to thrive in the new location!
Write a “Better in _____ (new city/town)” list
My dad always instilled in me to focus on what I can control. He said, “If you can do something about it, take action, but if you can’t do something about it, find a way to love it or make the best out of it.”
This way of thinking has served me well my whole life! Moving falls into the second category. I can’t control that we have a lifestyle where we relocate. BUT, I can learn to look for good in my new location. One way I do that is by keeping a running list on my phone’s notes- “Better in ______ (new town/city)
I look for the good. I write it down. Anytime I think of something better in the new location, I add it to the list! This is one way to embrace the present and make the most out of it.
Here’s my current list!
- Ice maker works
- Living room speaker is amazing
- An entire room dedicated to just being my dressing room
- I have one less toilet, tub, sink, and bathroom to clean in this house.
- House full of light
- skylight in dining area
- Super fast internet
- close to the ocean
- Ac
- closer to many things-
15 min from Costco, Winco, and Walmart - close to Nate’s work
- We can make money in Carnation home while here
- Naval base is off leash after it closes and is larger than by the lake
- Corner store we can bike or walk to
- Post office we can bike or walk to
- Best caramel ice cream
Keep a running list of places you want to visit in your new town and places you have already visited and want to visit again
When you’re doing your research on the area, write down all the locations you want to check out. I write down hikes, pizza places that have received medals from Italy, pump tracks for the boys, indoor play areas, great beaches for low tide and kite flying, foot massage locations, steakhouse recommendations etc. I’ll ask moms in the area about their favorite grocery stores, taco trucks, sushi places. I’ll ask about the best playgrounds, lakes to swim in, and skate parks. Once I’ve gone to a place, I’ll move it over to the bottom of the page so that I don’t forget about it!
Join all the Facebook groups
I’ve joined a Christian homeschool group, a homeschool group in the county I’m in, a homeschool adventure group, the local mom’s group, a friend finder group, a neighborhood group, the buy nothing group, and I’ve made my own mom’s group. If there’s a new in town group, I’d join that too! The key is to join all the groups that look like they meet IRL or the groups that look like they want to socialize. This is a tip from an extreme extrovert (100%). You never feel weird about looking for new friends when you are new in town! No one expects you to already have friends! If you wait a year before reaching out, or the longer you wait to try to make friends, the more awkward you will feel. If you’re a newbie you don’t have to think that other people are thinking, “Why doesn’t she have friends?” Not that they are thinking that, butyou might be thinking they are thinking that. Strike while it’s hot. There’s no better time to make new friends in a new town than when you are new to the area. And when you post on the groups, declare it! “Hi! I’m new in town and my two boys, ages 7 and 10 are looking for new friends!”
Post in the groups what you like! I’ve started a hiking group, a board game group, and I’ll be doing a karaoke group next month. All of this is through Facebook groups and messenger. I’ll post “ who likes hiking?” And then if they comment, I add them to the messenger group and I set up hikes and game nights.
I even set up play dates before we move so that we have something on the calendar after we settle in.
We moved April 20th and I have hosted 2 hiking meetups, scheduled a summer bbq potluck for the neighborhood for June, a ladies’ game night in June, gone to two homeschool gatherings, made four individual playdates out of those two gatherings, joined an elementary school game night, and I walk 4 days a week with the neighborhood walking group. Remember if you can only focus on two things for a happy life, it’s having a great romantic relationship and great friendships. All the effort is worth it!
Pray for your new community and neighborhood
If you’re a Christian, the best piece of advice I can give you for your move is to ask God to bless your family in this transition and ask Him how you can be a blessing to your new community-
“Lord I pray for this neighborhood and this community, that our family can be a blessing to these people while we are here. Show us where the needs are, how we can help. Give us opportunities to serve our new community and neighbors. Thank You that they have already made an effort to reach out to us, be neighborly, and welcome us.”
Have an attitude of gratitude and anticipate and expect good to come out of it! Most people don’t get what they want in life, hope for in life, or work hard for in life. Most people get what they expect they will get.
So expect good things! Hope this helps!!